Carrie Fisher died in December 2016
Billie Lourd is reflecting on her journey through grief after the passing of her mother, Carrie Fisher. Fisher, known for her role as Princess Leia in Star Wars, passed away in 2016.
In remembrance of her mother, Lourd shared a picture of Fisher on social media.
“It has been 7 years since my mom died (but who’s counting?? Me I guess?),” she wrote in the post’s caption.
“Every anniversary brings a different iteration of my grief. Some infuse me with rage, some make me cry all day long, some make me feel dissociated and empty, some make me feel nothing, some make me feel guilty for feeling nothing, and some make me feel all of those things all at once.”
Lourd continued, “This year when I woke up I felt grateful – or griefull if you will. Grief has infused my life with a sense of appreciation I had never had before. It makes me soak up every moment of joy as if it were my last.”
The Scream Queens actress teared up with joy as she held her napping daughter earlier on Wednesday. Lourd and her husband Austen Rydell have two children – a son named Kingston and a daughter named Jackson.
“I laughed at myself then cried more ’cause I was laughing,” Lourd wrote. “I felt my mombys presence like the warmth of the sun on your skin on a hot summer day. The kind of warmth where you unknowingly close your eyes and take a slow breath through your nose and grin.”
She added, “I miss her every day but the cliche is also true — she is with me every day — she infuses my joyful moments with even more joy. As I tell my son, she lives in the stars — and she damn sure makes my life sparkle. Sending my love to all my griefers out there. And hoping everyone can feel a little sparkle of griefull among all the feelings grief inevitably brings.”
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